Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize