haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
