Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
