Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
