that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
