now i know why i became what i already was.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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