Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
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