Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
