I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize