I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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