I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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