I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
