are you so shy because you have an std?
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Randomize
