i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
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