I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
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