I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
