She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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