Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
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