I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
