No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
