and you said cock pushups were impossible
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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