Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
my sisters under your porch take her home
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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