Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions