Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
