What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
