Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize
