maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
