I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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