he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Randomize