Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize