Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Randomize