Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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