Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
