I don't think brook has ever known best
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
No subtext here. People are naked.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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