ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
