"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
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She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
do nipples grow back?
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
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