; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
