you would pick up someone in the library
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
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