I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
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