Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
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I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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