I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Randomize
