We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
