I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
