from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize
