you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
