his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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