it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
