I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on