woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Randomize