eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
you never un-have a 4some
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
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