O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
So much rum. So many feels.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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