i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
